February 20, 2013
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shes home
As a family, we were really stoked when the doctors said my mum could come home.
Except we really didn’t know what that really meant.
So my mum is home now.
and a lot of things such as furniture had to be moved around. for starters theres a queen size bed set up in the family/lounge/kitchen area.(i dunno what you call that area). A couch is now awkwardly placed in the open spaced area of our house. It sits out like a fat bitch with an army of anorexics.
There was a lot of cleaning too, the house was vacuumed, twice mopped, and even I had to scrub the toilet until my back broke.
Unfortunately the hospital didnt really tell us when “exactly” she was coming home, like her illness, things happened all so quickly. We all figured it would be at the end of the week, turns out it was today. So even though the house was clean and the bed was setup, the fridge wasnt stocked.
Plus we werent mentally prepared for it.
Prepared to see my mum still in agonising pain because the medication sucks. We used to see moments of it, never the worst of it (usually at night) because we always left at 8pm.
Sometimes I used to dread going into the hospital, always anxious of how she was going to feel or be, everyday was a surprise. days where i thought she’d do well, wasn’t exactly like that.
Well, now the angst is back, and the worries are different. Having my mum home is pretty much a different ball game. When she was in hospital, I didn’t have to worry so much about her medical condition because the nurses took care of that. Now that she’s home, there aren’t nurses around to do that, so we have to be mindful about every little thing that we do and mindful of her actual condition and that she doesnt deteriorate. That’s what I fear most.
Seriously, this cancer stuff really ruins life.
